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- When you go to bed at night, you would rather Hear "Buffalo Soldier" by Bob Marley play at 110 decibels for 3 minutes at a time, at random intervals? than Have a deranged elf pour a bucket of water on you every 15 minutes?.
- You would rather Have a thieving maid/nanny than Have a drunk personal driver.
- If you were a pirate, you would rather have a pet monkey than have a talking parrot.
- You would rather Live in New York City than Live in Boston.
- You would rather Be a NASCAR driver than Be a horse jockey.