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Would you rather...

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Would you rather...

64% Have a lightsaber

36% Have a helper monkey

Would you rather...

64%
1,010,590 disagree
Have a lightsaber
36%
568,289 agree
Have a helper monkey

Hardest Choice Ever

added by Sam Dunn
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A legit Star Wars lightsaber or a helper monkey that would do anything for you (within reason and PETA rules).

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834 comments

  • 309

    Bahearn

    7 years ago

    My helper monkey would have a light saber so it's win/win.

    • 123

      ZmanElete

      4 years ago

      I dont even need the lightsaber. Monkeys are fricking cool

    • 91

      Vesko

      4 years ago

      My lightsaber would come with bonus ninja help monkeys. So it is win/win/win.

    • 68

      Peter

      4 years ago

      Sorry but I don't think a monkey can slice your enemies in half

    • 32

      Derrick Castaño Agu

      4 years ago

      helper monkey can grab a beer for me. Total win.

    • 33

      ossmosse

      4 years ago

      Yeah but really how many times will you actually use a lightsaber and not kill yourself?

    • 20

      Crazed3raser

      4 years ago

      once i saw that it had to be within PETA rules, i was like, nope

    • 34

      Diggler

      4 years ago

      PETA rules means he would do nothing for you.

    • 17

      Rickson Goncalves

      4 years ago

      yo you ever watch Malcolm in the middle, monkeys are pretentious evil homicidal demons

    • 7

      Licu Mihai

      4 years ago

      that what i thinked too!

    • 36

      Kyle

      4 years ago

      I killed your helper monkey with my light saber

    • 6

      Meemo2

      4 years ago

      umm fail.

    • 4

      Justus Smith

      3 years ago

      Why would your helper monkey have a lightsaber??? where did it say that?

    • 17

      1stwarror

      3 years ago

      No need for a lightsaber anyway. I mean, what are you going to do with it, kill people? You'll probably just use it to cut seasoning. It's not like it comes with force. A helper monkey on the other hand can be used for a lot more than culinary stuff.

    • 5

      jakereeno

      3 years ago

      It doesn't say the monkey can't talk so it's a win/win.

    • 12

      jakereeno

      3 years ago

      All I would need now is a pig and a segway and I've got myself a viral video

    • 15

      Foxy Boxes

      3 years ago

      1) Sell lightsaber to military. 2) Profit.

    • 3

      shane

      3 years ago

      well i would use the saber to cut down tress and own a lumber company = moar profit

    • 4

      Kristopher

      3 years ago

      Fuck this shit, my monkey has a machine gun, as in a PKP Pecheneg. MOOOOOONKEYS.

    • 6

      Varkarrus

      3 years ago

      The force is actually invisible helper monkeys

    • 2

      [deleted]

      3 years ago

      Marmosets are adorable! I want one!

    • 2

      UnderscoreZero

      3 years ago

      Bah, if you were caught with a lightsaber by police it'd be taken away or something.

    • 0

      that one guy

      2 years ago

      I kill your helper and you the take your lightsaber.

    • 2

      Cupcakes!

      2 years ago

      The monkey can get me a light saber so AGREED!

    • 2

      Ydanay

      2 years ago

      Or I could use a lightsaber to force someone to give me a monkey.

    • 1

      Joby Mcfarland

      2 years ago

      Because your monkey can get you a lightsaber

    • 2

      Cody Dudash

      2 years ago

      You need knowledge of the force to use a lightsaber, and I assume you only get the lightsaber, so it would just be a fancy paperweight.

    • 4

      nonclevername

      2 years ago

      A monkey with a light saber would kill itself within 20 minutes

    • 0

      Cassirinda

      2 years ago

      My helper monkey will murder everyone I hate

    • 0

      Somerandomwizard

      2 years ago

      Well MY LIGHT SABER HAS A HELPER MONKEY!!

    • 1

      Tasha xx

      2 years ago

      I WANNA MONKEY!!!!!!!! x

    • 4

      Jacob Dittmer

      2 years ago

      Your monkey would shit everywhere. Lightsabers don't shit

    • 3

      51%

      1 year ago

      fuck PETA they're a bunch of retards

    • 0

      WaffleFlakes

      1 year ago

      Yeah!

    • 1

      WindigoGaming87

      1 year ago

      A lightsaber would penetrate your ass.

    • 1

      Dexter

      1 year ago

      fook no i want a lightsaber

    • 0

      Cabamsoo

      1 year ago

      Lightsaber>Monkey

    • 0

      ~~Lucky_Girl~~

      1 year ago

      LIKE BLUES STOP! THE MONKEY COULD HAVE A LIGHR SABER

    • 0

      ~~Lucky_Girl~~

      1 year ago

      *light

    • 2

      Sparky233

      11 months ago

      What you would do is threaten the zoo-keepers with your light-saber and get a monkey.

    • 1

      Eli

      11 months ago

      No, guys you don't get the Force OK!

    • 0

      FrickinGamer

      11 months ago

      Now, who dont want the be Obi Wan?! Anyone?

    • 1

      shrek999

      11 months ago

      PETA RULES

    • 0

      PuzzelMaster123

      11 months ago

      FUck just relized that

    • 0

      emma

      11 months ago

      i never realized that

    • 0

      kyle

      11 months ago

      want to have illegal possesion of firearm? idontknow the right spelling

    • 1

      Poptart_Wizard

      11 months ago

      Well my lighsaber shoots out helper monkeys. It doesn't work like that

    • 0

      William Webb

      10 months ago

      Hello, he is a helper monkey, you must be paralyzed or blind or some shit like that

    • 0

      gameslayet

      10 months ago

      Or Would it

    • 0

      TheDoctorTARDIS

      10 months ago

      It's an all-purpose knife!

    • 0

      DamianV

      9 months ago

      I will sell the lighsaber for milions of dollars and buy the monkey.

    • 0

      dalaststandever

      9 months ago

      peta rules means you can't get the monkey to give you hand jobs all the time

    • 0

      [deleted]

      9 months ago

      |:(

    • 0

      Equality=Good

      8 months ago

      Dude Monkeys don't just sprout Lightsabers. Also, jakereeno, Its Just a monkey. Monkeys don't talk.

    • 0

      BrownieCakes

      8 months ago

      He can help me threaten scientists to make a light saber, then i could take a lot of them, make a crap ton of money, and happiness forever. Dont ruin my moment and say ill die

    • 0

      DanTDM

      8 months ago

      I would have a light saber like Luke SkyWalker!

    • 0

      NETHERDUCK

      8 months ago

      you are a smart lietle dude

    • 0

      Scarlette Foxx

      7 months ago

      You won the argument for me.

    • 0

      David Mills

      6 months ago

      1stwarrior the lightsaber could cut through morenthan food or people. It could cut through any metal, like a vault in the bank. And slash out the cameras. You could kill any witnesses

    • 0

      JamesxBoy101

      5 months ago

      No monkeys throw their poop's at people

    • 0

      JamesxBoy101

      5 months ago

      No monkeys throw their poop's at people

    • 0

      Alex

      5 months ago

      I got a lightsaber, yay-- Fuck, my arm!!!

    • 0

      ToboTEC

      5 months ago

      Yeah that would be great

    • 0

      The dancing sewar

      4 months ago

      Look at vesco

    • 0

      TheNetherDragon

      2 months ago

      You'd also be able to take the light saber and throw it at the monkey. Then see if it throws it back at you. lol

    • 0

      ttg raven

      1 month ago

      damn now i regret my answer

    • 0

      AustinIsNyanCat

      3 weeks ago

      My helper monkey would come with a machine that gives me anything i want and donates the stuff i don't win/win/win/win/win/win/win/win/win/win/win BA BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM I answered this question already and clicked the wrong thing ahh

    • 0

      Eshan Haider

      2 weeks ago

      THEN I WOULD KILL THE MONKEY WITH THE LIGHTSABER WITH MY FORM 4 OTARU

    • 0

      cp77

      1 day ago

      Lightsabers can cut through almost everything. Plus, just wear mandalorian iron armor

  • 32

    Stolkmen

    6 years ago

    Light Saber FTW! I would love to have one. Better than a monkey. They die. Sabers don't.

    • 7

      Freesemag

      4 years ago

      But what if you're drunk and accidentally cut off your own head?

    • 21

      Kyle Chainey

      4 years ago

      Then that's your dumb ass fault..

    • 1

      Ozzy

      3 years ago

      ^^ Because you chose the lightsaber..

    • 1

      Kristopher

      3 years ago

      Stolkmen, 3 years earlier, forgot the batteries to his Lightsaber.

    • 0

      PangestuJuan

      2 years ago

      Monkeys are sometime annoying

    • 0

      Cody Dudash

      2 years ago

      But, you need to know the force to use a lightsaber, so it would be useless.

    • 0

      Shulk

      11 months ago

      I don't need a lightsaber. I have the Monados power!

    • 0

      cp77

      1 day ago

      Kristopher, I have 4 fords for you: LIGHTSABERS DON'T NEED BATERIES

  • 21

    Rachel Anne Lastres

    4 years ago

    i would rather the elder wand -_-

  • 17

    Rythmbot

    4 years ago

    It's illegal to use what you use a lightsaber for. It's adorable to have monkey follow you around.

    • 7

      Tom Swift

      4 years ago

      Until it kills someone

    • 5

      berenkuntz

      3 years ago

      you think having a pet monkey isn't illegal!?

    • 1

      CJ K.

      3 years ago

      who says we're using the lightsaber for murder/other illegal activities?

    • 1

      MarkTheGr8

      3 years ago

      CJ K. In many places walking around with a 2.5 inch knife is illegal. I'm sure you wont be allowed to swing about with a lightsaber, unless it about 100% more light than saber.

    • 1

      AnduRo

      8 months ago

      Yes monkeys are cute

  • 16

    River_Song

    4 years ago

    you can always threaten a monkey to be your helper with the lightsaber

  • 13

    ZmanElete

    4 years ago

    Id have that helper monkey help me get a lightsaber

  • 10

    Rikujin

    4 years ago

    conquest

  • 7

    Lisa Wolf

    4 years ago

    my helper monkey would be that intelligent, he would build a lightsaber

  • 7

    Horshwa

    5 years ago

    My monkey will steal your lightsabers bitches

  • 6

    Tiki_Guy

    4 years ago

    I already have helper monkeys. They're called "friends"

    • 3

      Vampn

      3 years ago

      And that`s why I chose the monkey ;(

  • 5

    lilyconn

    4 years ago

  • 5

    Storm

    4 years ago

    I showed the bitches my helper monkey. Bitches love helper mokeys

  • 5

    Philtrum

    4 years ago

    Use the lightsaber to steal a helper monkey. Take over the world. /nod

  • 5

    tzk132

    5 years ago

    you can buy a helper monkey

  • 4

    Not_A_Guy

    2 years ago

    My light saver could help me gain a helper monkey... And various other objects

  • 4

    Andrew Smith

    3 years ago

    "You've got a helper monkey?" "Yeah." ZZZZHHHH "That's cute."

  • 4

    Kantoran

    3 years ago

    Lightsabers are just horrible amputation accidents waiting to happen.

  • 4

    pirate

    4 years ago

    Really, how do you guys plan to use a light saber? To kill people and go to jail?

  • 4

    Ben Greene

    4 years ago

    Why would you want a lightsaber? You wouldn't even be able to wield it unless you are a jedi.

    • 0

      Cheating Bastard

      3 years ago

      Where did you hear that only Jedi's can use lightsabers?

    • 0

      Ozzy

      3 years ago

      General Grievous disagrees Ben... He uses 4 and hes a fucking robot

    • 0

      Miriam

      2 years ago

      Guys, guys... 1) Why would you not want a light saber?! 2) Sith can also skillfully use a light saber. Or anyone, basically. But maybe not that skillfully. 3) Greivous was a cyborg, not a mere robot.

    • 0

      AnduRo

      8 months ago

      Anyone can use the lighsaber

  • 4

    overtherainbow

    5 years ago

    PETA rules would allow you to do basically nothing with your monkey. Lightsaber would be bad ass.

    • 8

      MarkTheGr8

      4 years ago

      It's a helper monkey. Unless you're going to attempt to rape your monkey, PETA's got nothing to say. Like buying a dog, y'know?

    • 1

      Sean Dawson

      4 years ago

      @Mark I fucking passed out from laughter XD

  • 1

    maxine

    4 weeks ago

    I LOVE MONKEYS

  • 1

    Taylor

    1 month ago

    My monkey would die the minute I got it

  • 3

    Alexander Banne Banning

    2 years ago

    The monkey can just take the lightsaber from someone..

  • 3

    Mateusz Kraszewski

    4 years ago

    LIGHTSABRUUU!!

  • 3

    Nathan Derpahurdle

    4 years ago

    Fuck PETA. Support a real cause not a bunch of sensationalists that kill more animals than they save.

  • 3

    Nick Vachon

    4 years ago

    I would make irresponsible mistakes with a light saber

  • 3

    itsthejizz

    4 years ago

    hands down, force up

  • 3

    nashcali22

    4 years ago

    i would kill myself with a lightsaber in 1 second

  • 3

    Forealms

    5 years ago

    Apart from the fact PETA would not want me to have a helper monkey, lightsabers satisfy an urge that every kid since the 70s has had.

    • 0

      jakereeno

      3 years ago

      Not me (I'm 14)

    • 1

      will

      1 year ago

      PETA actually doesn't want people to have pets. They think it isn't the animals choice so it is wrong. So basically the helper monkey wouldn't do anything. I decided to ignore the whole peta thing when choosing because the asker clearly knows nothing about it.

  • 3

    mat

    5 years ago

    I have nothing to cut.

    • 9

      Ayan Ajgaliev

      4 years ago

      When a lightsaber appears in your hand, you will have a world to cut!

  • 2

    ChadMakez

    7 months ago

    my monkey could do my schoolwork and homework.

  • 0

    War_Blunder

    2 days ago

    Use the lightsaber to rob someone of their helper monkey.

  • 0

    Androlid

    4 days ago

    And what about à laser helping monkey

  • 0

    Jose Jr Sanchez

    5 days ago

    monkeys for life

  • 0

    redgirrafepenis1259

    6 days ago

    I COULD BECOME A MOB LEADER NAMED Myles "monkey-helper" Wilson! THAT WOULD BE A DREAM COME TRUE

  • 0

    GorillaBacon

    1 week ago

    I meant to click monkey

  • 0

    Justin

    1 week ago

    USE DA FORCE LUKE

  • 2

    Salma Ibrahim

    3 years ago

    Curious George!

  • 2

    Schuman11

    3 years ago

    My helper monkey would make a light saber for me.

  • 2

    Ramroc

    4 years ago

    What else do you need with a monkey?

  • 2

    Jo Kristoffer

    4 years ago

    I don't I actually read this dilemma. I just saw 'monkey' and pressed it.

  • 2

    Jmoo14

    4 years ago

    Who wouldn't wasn't a monkey

  • 2

    Zach Harris

    4 years ago

    Honestly how often are you going to use a lightsaber?

  • 2

    Leon8455

    4 years ago

    "I don't see why you need the FORCE when you have a freaking lightsaber that can cut through anything, all you need then is a list of demands" :3

    • 1

      Read the description.

      7 months ago

      You need the force to wield a lights anger properly, otherwise it's a metal rod with a laser beam waiting to amputate everything.

  • 0

    Jake

    1 week ago

    what can a monkey do

  • 2

    Jim

    7 years ago

    Dance Monkey!!

  • 0

    SakuraCherryCat

    2 weeks ago

    we all going to ignore he fact that they think PETA is cool?

  • 0

    ty_guy

    2 weeks ago

    What would u use a lightsaber for ?

  • 0

    ty_guy

    2 weeks ago

    What would u use a lightsaber for ?

  • 0

    Bob The Builder

    2 weeks ago

    Lightsabers are over-rated, monkeys are under-rated.

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