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- You would rather Be publicly accused of pedophilia than Be publicly accused of 1st degree murder.
- You would rather Be constantly followed by 32 ducks for the rest of your life than Have 4 meters long arms.
- You would rather be a thirdstring QB for a bad NFL team than be the MVP QB for a arena football team.
- You would rather go to work than be on jury duty.
- You would rather vote for Barack Obama than vote for Mitt Romney.
paintpuff
in soviet russia, snow don't fall on you, you fall on snow. fun.
GetPwned
since when does snow fall on you? I dont go outside until it stops. Then the sledding can start, which is falling on snow for the record
WilhelmDokiDoki
In Soviet Russia, which no longer exists, these jokes are still funny. In other words, stop.
tyler
Russias Winters are extremely dangerous as you have or will learn in history the russians used their winter to win a fight agianst germany.
LordMackarl
@tyler You must be extremely cultured.
snoopy1556
I had more fun in China than Russia...
Iggy
@WilhelmDokiDoki So, does that mean, that everywhere else, funny still are these jokes? In other words, Yoda?
MMMKAY
In Soviet Russia, the bass drops you
[deleted]
In Soviet Russia, grass cut you.
LLLLLLOOOOOOOLLLLLLL
@tyler agianst franch
Final Detonation
In Russian Federation milk drinks YOU
Slashy1632
in soviet Russia Pokémon catch you.
InsanePrettyParrot
In Soviet Russia, dogs walk YOU.
milkninjas
in soviet russia,cows make STEAK out of YOU
Cody Dudash
In Soviet Russia, Waldo find you.
Trent
In America you have right to bear arms, in soviet Russia you have right to whole bear
Utah G
lol china has great wall, cool buildings UC, lower homicide rate than america, forbidden city, and toilets that can actually flush toiletpaper. Russia on the other hand has the kremlin, moscow ibc, high homicide rate, st petersberg, neat cathedrals, and doesnt ban youtube Yeah russia isnt communist anymore and china has made reforms since the forbidden square protest. You should have said north korea or vietnam.
Utah G
In soviet russia, you dont rush locals for taking forever; the locals rush you because when someone's russian there's no stalin.
CookieCaffine
My parents have a house in China, so free house!
Magnus M.
Id be protected. Right?
jonathan
in soviet russia you don't meet CrazyRussianHacker CrazyRussianHacker meets you
Rabu Tsuyoiude
In Soviet Russia, Soviet Russia joke tells you!
Rabu Tsuyoiude
In Soviet Russia, bed sleep on you!
sara williams
Russia thinks americans are spys...not going there
harry368368
i live in china so......(actully i lives in hong kong but it's really close to china)
chinese man
fuck china
lilzaratata
in soviet russia, you rob bank. But in capitalist america, bank robs you
Arion
I live russia
Yeeeeeeees.
In China you can smell the air.
Pokedog123
I would say russia....but Red Dawn....... (the old one)
Randoman
It's funny because it reminded me of the constant purges Stalin did on his government staff.
Amelietheduck
air pollution or basically minnisotas mother
Drew
I should like to meet Lenin's dead corpse
Pokemonguy
In soviet Russia bacon sizzles u!
alexmotorin
In Soviet Russia,you dont eat food,but food eats you! In Soviet Russia,you dont hunt deers,but deers hunt you!
☯Chilled☯
Saint Petersburg FTW
markiplierfangirl
in soviet Russia dick suck you
IlovePuusy
in soviet Russia, question answers YOU
Alexa
BUT SOVIET RUSSIA ARE CANNIBALS
Lyrica Prismriver
normal life or toxic gas for life
TurdManJones
In America You Pee In Toilet , In Soviet Russia Toilet pee in you
Dood
In america you type on keyboards, In Soviet Russia keyboards type on you
Evalgra
In Soviet Russia, TV watch YOU
wormguy
In Soviet Russia, ICECREAM lick YOU
Τίμο
true comrade
Juan
russia has all enviroments so id have a great vacation
ANgelA
i live in china so...
A Soldier Who Isn't Famous Yet
In soviet russia, You no use guns. Guns use YOU.
SANIC
IN RUSSIA YOU DONT PLAY MARIO, MARIO PLAY YOU!
Ayush
Yeah and also, this effin Covid shit was made in china! :P
Countryhumans
Yeah, and also I have relatives in russia and my family wanted to visit them but couldn't since covid and then economical crash so I WANT TO SEE MY BABUSHKAS! AND MY DAD THERE!
Ethan Kalhs
in china most pepole are dicks
msvegeta
didn't seem that way when I went
Luna
Because you're obviously well acquainted with most people in China.
professor_oak
That's exactly what the rest of the world says about America
iroarallison
Uh so not true the Chinese are all honest and awesome they are nice and the fact that you are saying tht makes you one too
Pedro Henrique Nunes
In terms of culture China > Russia in my opinion.
DERPZgaming
russia is a homosexual place and because iam half hawaiian i can't wear my grass skirt
Icyfire
AHEM (Chinese Canadian here)
Decelerator
Agreed. Besides I don't want to have a vacation in a country I was born in.
Magnus M.
In china I dont have to worry about cyber attacks, but russia is the same thing, but with cyber removed.
Pokemonguy
On either.io Ethan Kahls is a dick.
OmegaAlph
Racist ass
Natural Selection
Offffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffended!
Bruh
Fuck china!
cozmincp
I live in Russia so..
Rodney Bishop
I live in Canada so russia would kinda be similar.
DERPZgaming
iam an alien from canada soo...
CatBounce
Honestly, my option is only based on the fact that a lot more Chinese are moving out than Russians, but every country has it's fair share of bad places.
Pokemonguy
I live on Jupiter sooo..
markiplierfangirl
same bro
SANIC
I live on pluto
Mossy
China. You can pay the equivalent of five dollars for an exquisite meal.
Breezy43z
ya in U.S money in china a good meal is a lot of money
Tony
Bears on Unicycles!
Azimuth
Yes comrade!
PollinatedPotato
Yay!
markiplierfangirl
srsly
Azzik
Vodka !
Yeeeeeeees.
Make greatest country proud comrade!
Hobo Joe
In Soviet Russia, you don't do the dishes, the dishes do you.
milkninjas
that kind of sounded wrong there,how the dishes DO YOU
Rabu Tsuyoiude
In Soviet Russia, Food eats you!
markiplierfangirl
oh god
Dood
In Soviet Russia you don't buy food, the food buys you
SANIC
In soviet russia you dont say FUCK, FUCK say YOU
idpiasg
People Moscow isn't that bad. it's more southern (warmer) and has a lot more industry and stuff to do.
Vladislav Pavlov
Are you kidding? Isn't that bad? Moscow is one if the greatest cities. Of all the megapolises I've lived it's one of my favourites. (The fact that it is my hometown doesn't make my opinion biased.)
mdfst
@Vladslav Pavlov prosti but it does
markiplierfangirl
stfu American
msvegeta
China is so pretty. And unique.
Jush Heisenberg
And communist. And genocidal. Pretty, fun Tibetan genocide. Yay!
Talking2idiots
^ I love you.
raiden
Been to both , and china is 13476436739032 times better
raiden
Been to both , and china is 13476436739032 times better
Soarry
China has better food.
CatBronze
I pass out in crowds
Emily Shen
LOL I only chose China because I'm chinese
Yeeeeeeees.
So you'd go to vacation to your house?
Randi Wen
Same
aez
Fuck China, Russia is the greatest country.
Baptiste Guallar
Russia is an homophobic shit-hole.
Ashot-3000
@Baptiste Guallar THATS GOOD, idiot...
Dood
AntiX
racist
BloodyKnives
inb4 soviet russia jokes
Pr0Wolf
In America you have the right to bare arms, in soviet Russia you have the right to arm bears
ZenAngelSinger
I'd love to see the Terra Cotta Army & the Forbidden City.
CocoTheKiller
been to china. loved it. would like to go again
artemis3
Russia is invading Ukraine....fun....
Justin
Chinese food!!!!!!
Mark
Nice and cold and quiet nice place to listen to music and get away from 95% of the idiots at my town
Shouyou
Don't travel in China, there is Coronavirus
ChIcKeN nUgGeT
All hail Soviet Russia where toilets crap on you
ChIcKeN nUgGeT
E
TrueConservative1
China is CRAZY polluted
Batman
I agree lol
odinsky48
Well, i don't want them to shout "CYKA BLYAT" right in my ears, so...
love_peeta_josh
I really would to prefer to stay in Australia..
Doodafish
I would like to visit my home country again FYI I was born and raised in Russia
Iddo van den Hout
russian for live
simba
In Soviet russia: "I didn't choose the vodka life, the vodka life choose me."
Abigail Rose Miller
If anybody watches Hetalia its friggin RoChu
SunnyCrapCake
I know next to nothing about both. But it would be useful to learn Chinese, because it would help my Japanese :P
Усамљени Вук
Chinese are all squinty eyed fucks
Marko Milovanovich
im serbian so go russia
Richard
No Their not. Don't be racist.
THE RULER OF EVERYTHING
Зачеши швеи ждал вам тяг на на на ыа
Jush Heisenberg
I hate the current PRC government, and I don't want to give money to it. If it became a more libertarian country I would prefer China. But it's currently an authoritarian nation. So Russia.
magicsalad
You're ignorant and I feel really offended by your comment bro
sddadasdsadasd
la russia c'ha le peggio fighe ricchioni
bridget
i dont like china for real cause they eat anything even fetus and dogs
Clete
don't forget "covid"
AntiX
ok so first off just because some people eat dogs and stuff it doesnt mean they suck and two, covid is worse in america than china. also china has way better food and a lot more travel locations. dont judge a country just because of the news.
Skeleton33
With the corona virus? Heck no!
AntiX
corona cases dropped to 14 to 20 a day you dumbo america has literally like 27.7k each day, and also russia has around 8000 cases each day
Awesome Sauce
bro who wants to get corona?
AntiX
corona cases dropped to 14 to 20 a day you dumbo america has literally like 27.7k each day, and also russia has around 8000 cases each day
grayson
coronavirus duh
MarvelNERD3000 666
no one wants Coronavirus
AntiX
corona cases dropped to 14 to 20 a day you dumbo america has literally like 27.7k each day, and also russia has around 8000 cases each day
Jakey
I mean coronavirus scary sooo...
ashden
im not finna get the corona virus XD
ashden
im not finna get the corona virus XD
rails
never that
AntiX
corona cases dropped to 14 to 20 a day you dumbo america has literally like 27.7k each day, and also russia has around 8000 cases each day
vlad
in 2022 russia is hella sanctioned so no i pick china
james
Hmm having to wear a coat to protect me from the cold or having to wear a mask to protect me from the smog/pollution? I think ill take the coat
Romekj
i hate Russia it attacked Ukraine and Poland my fathers and mothers countrie
cheetahlover6363
china because thats almost the same thing as japan and prob if i go to china i can go see japan too. japan has my fav singer hatsune miku
Daniel
Shut up, weeb. JK I'm one too...*cries*
BionicFinn
I don't get why more people want to go to china 1st they are communists (Russia is to) 2nd they have BAD BAD pollution 3rd they are a big counterfeit market.
AntiX
racist
E-C-Chris
I suddenly realized how bad my decision was after a realized I'd probably be burned for being gay.
CeCii
It's communist in china. And they control the internet!! Oh yeah! Imagine your restrictions on internet. Idk think there even allowed internet. Same with north korea. And the over population. It's way crowded.
Utah G
internet is allowed in china its just that some websites like youtube are banned and btw the NSA also monitors the internet its just that theyll only do something about it if you possess child porn or videos of torturing people
Batman
They allow vpns. They only regulate it occasionally
Derp
Considering the quality of hotels in Sochi......I would choose china
aritay95
Vodka!
Talking2idiots
I don't wanna be with them god damned Communist!
northsouthland
I chose this for MOTHER RUSSIA!
purplemoderate
Just went to Russia on vacation and it was amazing!!!!
Doodafish
I would like to visit my home country again FYI I was born and raised in Russia